Think back to something you did that you feel guilty or shameful about. Close your eyes and picture yourself in the situation. Look at your heart… Were you acting out of pain, confusion, or fear? Were you looking for love in all the wrong places? Were you broken, sad, or at a rough point in your life? I bet you were.
You weren’t rubbing your hands together and cackling an evil laugh. Muahahaha! You aren’t a monster with the hobby of wanting to hurt yourself or someone else. You are human and humans mess up. A lot. Humans make big mistakes. Humans do stupid, hurtful things. Humans are… well, human.
It’s time to stop replaying that movie in your mind of the crappy things you’ve done to show yourself how bad you are or how much you need to be punished. It’s time to forgive that broken person who did something they regret.
Why don’t I want you to keep beating yourself up? Because guilt zaps all this great energy you could use to focus on doing better in the future. It zaps energy you could be using to improve yourself. Making yourself feel guilty just makes you want to do more destructive stuff. It’s counterproductive.
Guilt is toxic to the spirit. Yes, learn from your mistakes. No, don’t carry guilt anymore. It’s heavier than a herd of elephants on your chest.
You’re not a bad person and you’re not alone in this feeling. No one talks about the crappy things they’ve done because it’s not exactly a good dinner conversation. It’s not a party topic.
Even the sweetest people make hurtful mistakes. Look back on what you did and look at your intention. Maybe it was an honest mistake… Maybe you were uneducated and you didn’t know any better… Maybe you were afraid… Maybe someone hurt you or someone else… Maybe you didn’t feel accepted so you did something “mean” to fit in… Maybe you were doing your best for where you were in that moment.
Whatever happened, it’s time to stop beating yourself up. It’s time to hug that person who royally screwed up and tell them, “It’s okay” and “let’s work to do better in the future.”
Treat yourself as you would a dear friend .Would you remind them every day of their biggest mistake in life? No! That’s cruel. So why are you doing it to yourself? You are not a bad person…
Forgive yourself; you are not perfect.
Show yourself grace; you are still learning.
Show yourself patience; you are on a journey.